Solid Changes and Silver Linings

Something strange has happened lately. I have stopped scrutinizing my life so much. I haven't been putting my actions or the actions of others under a microscope. Why that is...I have no idea. I think that, unknown to myself, I've actually, for the first time in my life, just let some things go. That, is kinda huge for me, because sometimes I have the tendency to hang on to things so tightly that I kill them.

I'm living life, not constantly analyzing it. Is the definition of a contented life, really just an unexamined one?

My life has kind of evened out. There's still some shitty shit, but there are some great things going on right now too. Overall, things are not spectacular, but they sure are better than they have been! Yeah, I still ache from the end of my relationship with Brian. But LIFE seems to know better what I need, than even I do most of the time. Maybe there is something to that whole 'when life closes a door it opens a window' thing.

One of the biggest stressors on my relationship with Brian was the fact that four of the people who are most important to me exited my life at the same time. Consequently, I became way to dependent on Brian. And it was too much for him.
Well, now I have been forced to find new friendships and it's been a much needed change in my life. I've begun to hang out with my co-workers from school several times a week. They have been the most supportive friends to me over the past several months and strong friendships are certainly developing there. It's a very "Elon-like" feeling. Friendships forming out of time spent together through the good and the bad. I also have begun to reach out to some other aquaintances that I feel I really could connect with. None of this would have ever happened if I had not been forced to do this. None of this would have ever happened if not for the break-up.

And that, is just one of the many silver linings that I have started to find in the hard events of the past three months.